Seasonal Style Depression pt. 1
As the blaring beeps went off silently, I slowly faded away from what I thought was a night out at the best speakeasy in the city, but it was just a dream. It was 5:55 am, on the dot and my body just couldn't budge, but my mind grew alert and vision a little less blurred. I unconsciously slid into the crips, cool atmosphere. I shuffled my way over to my closet door and hit the flashlight on my phone; scanning everything in the room as if the items were under strict surveillance.
Hmmm, what I'm feeling like today?' I'm sure if my clothes could groan, some of them would definitely say, "Girrrrrrl! You ask this every time you come up in here." And then I might have pieces speaking to me like, 'un un, Starria ignore them, they just mad you forgot to throw them in the wash last week.' Humoring myself definitely woke me up and led me to search for something cute and cozy. It was the dead of winter in Michigan, but thankfully it was a work-from-home day, so something cozy and light was gonna be just right.
I pulled out my knit light gray Lucky Label jumpsuit (with the black embroidery on the wrists) and was instantly taken back to a moment where I actually made this piece into a slight look instead of just something comfy to throw on. The person who helped me style this simple look was someone who I considered to be a friend and they poured confidence into me wearing this look…but crazy enough, not even a year later that same person was the very one trying to tear that same confidence down.
I focused back into reality as I shook my head noticing the glare of my flashlight starting to beam too bright, bouncing from my left to right eye. 'Okay, let me go head and finish gettin' my day started,' I thought. I started pulling the jumpsuit up on my body as the rest of the stretched-out fabric slowly crawled behind. I headed down the five-step hallway to my bathroom to freshen up for my day and the moment I stepped foot onto the mat and hit the lights, an illuminating glow slowly welcomed me into a familiar moment…it was another time I had styled this same piece quite simply, and at that moment a conversation came into play that somewhat went like…
Starr: You know, I just really been thinking about all these content ideas for Select Styles…this one, in particular, would be a series on how to still stay in tune with your wardrobe and style even if we're all working from home now.
The Homie: Well yeah these are cool ideas, but honestly with that one…nobody's really gonna be interested about that since we ARE all at home. It's like no point in really getting dressed, ya know?
It's like I had stepped back into the moment seeing myself, sitting at my desk in my 2021 studio office, having this text conversation with that same 'friend'..who months prior was just encouraging me to put more looks together…I honestly don't remember how the conversation continued, but in this moment of reflection, I realized that was a moment where that person just didn't get my vision…and unfortunately, because I saw them as a person who had my best interest, I allowed it to dim my light instead of just brushing it off and moving forward with my ideas. Me being me, I still smiled it off because a tiny piece of me was down, down deep….rooting that we'd somehow still reach that new freedom of creativity.
My lashes slowly started batting together washing away the blur from the memory and putting my view back in focus. I took a moment to really look at myself; after all of those thoughts just ran through my mind, I realized that I had allowed that person and a bunch of other sh*t to turn me into my own worst enemy. And because of that, I started associating this jumpsuit with a low vibration of comfort rather than a high creative frequency of growth, like the first time I wore it.
I noticed I only gravitated towards wearing this piece during the winter months in the city, but in doing so I still wasn't dressing the jumpsuit up...more like the jumpsuit was just wearing me. Why wear something and not make it have you looking your best and let alone feeling your best? Growing more self-awareness, I realized that it's time I unapologetically take back control of my style story.
In this moment of self-reflection, I want to encourage you to think about certain clothes you gravitate towards based on moments and memories that no longer serve your best self.
Reaching this point in life is a sense of style healing that's needed to break through into a new version of yourself. What we wear represents how we feel just as much as who we are; to help you start your journey there are three things you can do:
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