Have you ever had a big event coming up and you didn't know what to wear, or how to do your hair, but somehow still pulled it together the day of? Well if you thought yes then you already understand a little bit about how this story is going to go.
It was my first 'big girl' formal work event and everyone had been talking about it since summer. As the fall breeze had finally set in, I realized I should probably start looking for an outfit. Well, that didn't happen as early as it should've; life had a hold on me and having an outfit for this 'big event' had totally slipped my mind.
The week before this Gala, there was a work event held in person (we work remotely), and that's when it smacked my forehead and brought out a twitch in my left eye. Throughout the day, "What're you wearing next Saturday?" and "Did you get your dress yet?" were the questions that kept bouncing around the space right in front of me.
So…I had to be honest, "Nothin yet, but what do you think about this?" I had pulled up a few PLT holiday dresses, but everyone's responses included 'not formal enough, but you'd look good in it.' This got my wheels turning. I didn't really want to sacrifice my funds for a one-time event, and the inexpensive options I found weren't screaming, 'formal work event'.
A quick back story, I just started the job earlier this year, moved back in September, and was still making plans to get the furniture I truly desired upon moving in.
After speaking with my coworkers about different dress options, I was definitely going into my closet to make something out of nothing work. The gala theme was ‘Champagne Ball,’ which meant we could wear any type of evening look, but our staff suggested we follow the colors of our theme, mauve, teal and cream….Well, when you have to make something out of nothing work, breaking the rules just comes with the territory.
I already had the only two looks in mind I could pull off, a bright panther pink, one-shoulder and long slit on the side dress orrrr a velvet emerald green, short-dumbbell sleeves, long v-neck with a long spit in the front dress. To help me decide, I laid both dresses on the floor with the shoes and accessories I would wear with either…Both options looked good, but in order for me to make a slightly bold statement, I went with the emerald green, not too loud, but bold enough, plus the shoes I had were a great compliment.
I knew that the v in the front was super long down my chest, so I was already prepared to pin it. But for some odd reason on the night of, everyone was looking directly at my chest as if I were walking around with my nipples out…soooo me growing aware of that, I immediately went back to the bathroom to pin it just a couple of inches higher. If this were any other event I wouldn’t have cared and would’ve just given people the same weird they were giving me back to them, but considering this was my first work event, I wanted to keep things professional and modest. So after repining my V, I continued throughout the night and no longer received looks of concern and judgment but instead received looks of admiration and curiosity. Either way I remained unbothered and sipped my champagne🍾
After my ‘work part’ of the night was done, I casually enjoyed the company of myself. As I observed the crowd, all I could think was….
[everyone there obtained at least over 50k on a light day. I was in a room with people in high places in the tech world and just based on observation, I wasn’t really interested in getting to know anyone. Why? Well, here I am, a black woman from the east-side of Detroit as well as the youngest worker (there were other young girls there, but they were all students who had won a scholarship…not comparable.) But on top of that, there I was in a dress from four seasons ago with $20 to my name. I didn’t feel less than, but I definitely felt like the most clever in the room. The amount of complements I received just proved as a point that people never really know how much you have or don’t have.]
So, moral of the story, whatever you wear no matter how long you’ve had it or if it’s brand new, the way you put your look together and the way you wear it will speak volumes of who you are louder than what you have. The other thing is to never ever be intimidated or question your worth based on knowing your circumstances and observing others because what they have going on doesn’t matter. I could’ve grown insecure that night realizing everyone’s net-worth, but instead, I took that as a sign of power because no one knew my asset worth but still presented me the respect and admiration I deserve.
So ladies, when it comes down to making a something out of nothing kind of outfit, just remember that you can always….
-pay on words to say how they can give more with who they are and something instead of less…just to tie in the title and make it full circle.
FOOTNOTES
In this short clip (25:10-25:31), listen to how our homegirl Glamazontay shares her perspective on showing up for the best version of yourself. How being in rooms where you appear to be the “lesser," can be spun into a positive if you shift your mindset to understand your own self worth and value.
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